This week is "Baby Week" on Discovery Health, one of my favorite networks. I am addicted to shows about morbidly obese people such as "Inside Brookhaven Medical Clinic" or "Big Medicine." "Mystery Diagnosis" was interesting for a while, but the end diagnoses are never all that interesting, at least not interesting enough to invest the hour watching the show.
So today I learned some doctors, if a baby looks like it is going to be too big, will induce labor. More importantly, most doctors estimate the size of the baby towards the end of the pregnancy. My doctor did not do this. And the bohemouth that was infant J nearly killed me. All is well that ends well, but it would have been nice to not deliver a ginormous baby without an epidural in about 20 minutes and then bleed out. I mean I got to have a kid that rocks a mean "sprout" ponytail and that is worth it in and of itself. Oh and now she can identify who is on a dollar bill. This is our favorite party trick. She says "George Washington" in her cute voice. See picture above for ponytail.
Also, glad I didn't higher a doula. I thought about it being that I couldn't depend on X and I was scared shitless. I don't know if they hang out with you during labor at home, I guess that would have been nice, as I did that part by myself - alone in my room watching Law & Order rerun after rerun and trying to remember the stupid things I could do to make myself more comfortable. But if they don't, she would have had a very short work day. The people on these shows like doulas so they are on the mind.
I think I may hate baby week because it makes me think of having J. I wish that the end of my pregnancy, having the baby, and being a brand new mom conjured good memories. But to be honest, it really doesn't. (Don't tell J). I guess that is why I am not on a Discovery Health show. That and I cannot imagine why these people let video cameras around them when they know the end result will require their junk being blurred out when aired on TV.
Tomorrow is "World's Smallest Mom," which could be interesting. Tag line: "She's only three feet tall, but she found the world's greatest joy."
And an addendum to my post re: gum. It is Orbit sweet mint gum and it is only really good for about 7 minutes. So I am sticking to my light blue extra or dark blue trident.
2 comments:
Is J actually crouching flat-footed? I thought that was pretty rare for American babies, but not for Asia, where flat-footed crouching in more common. I take this as more evidence that she is exceptionally talented.
J is a crazy good flat footed croucher. Didn't know that was rare. I am jealous of her talent though because when we squat in yoga class I have to lift my heels up or only go down about 2 inches. So I am in awe of J's abilities - good to know others notice!
I am going to google this flat-footed crouching now.
Post a Comment