Tuesday, July 22, 2008

J has a dream.....

This morning I was chatting with J and this is the conversation we had:

Me: Did you sleep well last night?
J: Yes.
Me: Did you have any dreams?
J: Yes.
Me: Oh really, do you know what a dream is?
J: Obama.

So apparently J thinks Obama is a dream. She actually can identify him in pictures and on the news. Also, when we were waiting in the airport a few weeks ago for hours on end, a woman had an Obama t-shirt on - it just said "Obama '08," no graphics or picture. J walks up to her puts her hands in the air and shouts "OBAMA!" The woman invited her to join the campaign. I was just amazed that J apparently can recognize the word/name Obama. Beyond once asking her if she would vote for Clinton or Obama, J and I do not discuss politics. Hilarious.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Mission Impossible: Dating

Ok, I know that I complain alot on this blog. The thing is that when I first moved to Philly, I was super bummed but somewhat optimistic about my personal future. Now here I am, a year and a few months later, and I find myself becoming bitter. These are the things I learned as I have tried to "date" as an "adult."

1. For me, online dating sucks. I tried it again for about a week and a half and did get alot of emails (I am not proactive in that I don't email people, too shy). I went out on two dates. On the first, the guy talked about himself non-stop, didn't listen to anything I said, and then tried to eat my face at the end of the date. On the second, the guy said the restaurant I picked was too loud, informed me that his last online date ended in sex, and then took me up on my polite offer to pay - the entire bill. All of this on top of the 52 year old vegan who said that he thought I was "cute" but didn't agree with my "love of dead cow" (I said I like hamburgers on my profile) and that I should "hit him up if I want to chat." Ummmm...you are 52, bald with a grey beard, and openly think you are better than me because you are vegan while I hunt defenseless cows and eat them raw. I canceled my account immediately after getting this email.

----> as a side note, online dating invites the possibility of meeting people who just want to "chat" like online. I do not have time for this and I do not need some kind of cyberbuddy. I found this frustrating, I would rather just meet not email for weeks on end.

2. People cheat on me. My boyfriend in law school cheated on me, only to marry his paralegal. X cheated on me. The person I did actually date for a few months pressured me to date "exclusively" not cluing me in that I would be the one staying exclusive while he would date around. I am not sure what it is about me, but people cheat on me. And I seem to catch them. They aren't even good at it. Leading me to point three...

3. When I think of a relationship, I think it means someone who you have to try to please but never can, someone who insults you and makes you feel bad about yourself, someone who thinks that they are better than you, someone who will cheat on you to find someone better, someone who you don't trust and someone who will in the end take your money, your pride, and leave you knocked up. This view is totally f'ed up and I need to change it. As weird as it seems, I am kind of just realizing this as I debate whether I really want to date again.


So all of this to say, chin up self. I am going to lay low on the forced dating (while at the same time staying open minded) and try to enjoy my single life. Of course this is easier said than done as I look around and see people (well specifically women) who definitely suck married to good guys. And X who spent a total of two months single, I mean come on! Alright, breaking my own rule already. I will always have J as my date - I mean she is a pretty cute oatmeal eater (see above) and has very good manners.

Friday, July 11, 2008

Shock and Awe

Is it ok to be amazed by your own kid? I admit to being completely uneducated about what "developmental stages" kids should hit when, but lately I have been thinking J is pretty awesome. To that end, I present the reasons why I am in awe of my child:

- she told me the other day that she "hadn't seen butterflies in over a week." And she was right! No one had taken to her to the butterfly garden at the museum of natural sciences (where we are members, so she is there alot) in over a week. But, um, how does she know what a week is?

- she likes Blue's Clues and requests it. She also likes to go to Claire's Boutique and pick out cheap jewlery. We were there one day and she saw a small spiral notebook, similar to the one the host of blue's clues uses to write down clues. She pointed to it saying "notebook," took it down, called it a "handy dandy notebook" (which the host calls his) and instructed me to "pay for it." Once I had, she requested a pen which she stuck through the spirals exactly like the blues clues guy.

- she picks out her own shoes everyday and most times puts them on herself.

- she saw that I hung up two similar pictures in my room and informed me that there were two that were "kinda the same."

- she can ride her tricycle about two feet.

- she has a plastic cow that has a blue spot on him, ink or something. She told me that this was a "dirty cow." Then told me she would "wipe him off." When that didn't work I suggested that we might have to wash him with soap, causing her to run into her bathroom and soap up that cow. We never got the spot off, and now he will forever be the "dirty cow." This morning he was in her tea pot which she found hilarious.

- speaking of tea - she sets up her favorite guys, usually a lamb, a baby, and barney to have tea parties. She serves "dirty cow tea" and "coffee."

- if you ask her why she may get a treat she says "if I pee pee on the pottty."

- if you ask her who is on the one dollar bill she say "Washington."
- she knows her ABCs and can count to eleven.

So, if you couldn't tell, I haven't spoken to my mother all week because she is busy entertaining friends, so I have not had a chance to share any funny, listen to what J did stories. I am sorry if I am boring you all, but the lack of husband contributes to my need to share and have someone else go - you are right she is amazing (hint hint).

Oh and the picture above is what she does when you ask her to smile. I think Tyra Banks got a hold of her, so now she only does "fierce." Props to Aunt Bizarley for the dress at this photo shoot. Just ignore her hair, she doesn't like to sit for hair and make-up.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

Bitter Much?

I received this email from the coordinator of a "Hip Single Parents" Group I joined. I haven't made it to any events yet and given the email below, I am pretty sure that now won't make it to any.

"Due to the amazing amount of whining, I will no longer be organizing events for the Hip Parents Group. For those that enjoy a well organized event, please feel free to stop by and see us on the South Jersey Single Parents Meetup site. While most of our activities are geared to the active 4+ year olds, a few of the members will be hosting toddler events too.

You shouldn't join if:

1. You like to complain
2. You mind coming to NJ for most events
3. Your child is a pain in the ass and you clearly have no control.
4. Your eating habits (i.e. vegan) prohibit you from bringing a pack of hot dogs to a BBQ.
5. You RSVP, then do not show.
6. You're overly sensitive

We are here to help 95% of the people get out and enjoy life with their children, but you other 5%.... well it is really no mystery why you're single. -Michael"

Needless to say this gave me the warm fuzzies.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

It's A Hard Knock Life

Here are some pictures of J lounging it up in Kiawah. Pretty sweet deal, huh?

Monday, July 7, 2008


I realize I suck at blogging lately. But I have a ton of cute pictures and will be sharing them shortly. They will include (but not be limited to)
- J on the PONY!!!
- J in cute dress from Aunt Bizarley
- J in pool with goggles
- J and me
- naked ladies

Just kidding on that last one, just trying to keep everyone interested in ye' old blog of generally boring items.

Oh and you can blame my hiatus in part on Facebook. I finally gave in a signed up and have been slightly obsessed for the past two weeks. Other things to blame - j.o.b., shopping sprees, young child, eye infection, and summer.