Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Mission Impossible: Dating




Ok, I know that I complain alot on this blog. The thing is that when I first moved to Philly, I was super bummed but somewhat optimistic about my personal future. Now here I am, a year and a few months later, and I find myself becoming bitter. These are the things I learned as I have tried to "date" as an "adult."


1. For me, online dating sucks. I tried it again for about a week and a half and did get alot of emails (I am not proactive in that I don't email people, too shy). I went out on two dates. On the first, the guy talked about himself non-stop, didn't listen to anything I said, and then tried to eat my face at the end of the date. On the second, the guy said the restaurant I picked was too loud, informed me that his last online date ended in sex, and then took me up on my polite offer to pay - the entire bill. All of this on top of the 52 year old vegan who said that he thought I was "cute" but didn't agree with my "love of dead cow" (I said I like hamburgers on my profile) and that I should "hit him up if I want to chat." Ummmm...you are 52, bald with a grey beard, and openly think you are better than me because you are vegan while I hunt defenseless cows and eat them raw. I canceled my account immediately after getting this email.

----> as a side note, online dating invites the possibility of meeting people who just want to "chat" like online. I do not have time for this and I do not need some kind of cyberbuddy. I found this frustrating, I would rather just meet not email for weeks on end.


2. People cheat on me. My boyfriend in law school cheated on me, only to marry his paralegal. X cheated on me. The person I did actually date for a few months pressured me to date "exclusively" not cluing me in that I would be the one staying exclusive while he would date around. I am not sure what it is about me, but people cheat on me. And I seem to catch them. They aren't even good at it. Leading me to point three...


3. When I think of a relationship, I think it means someone who you have to try to please but never can, someone who insults you and makes you feel bad about yourself, someone who thinks that they are better than you, someone who will cheat on you to find someone better, someone who you don't trust and someone who will in the end take your money, your pride, and leave you knocked up. This view is totally f'ed up and I need to change it. As weird as it seems, I am kind of just realizing this as I debate whether I really want to date again.


4. REDACTED


So all of this to say, chin up self. I am going to lay low on the forced dating (while at the same time staying open minded) and try to enjoy my single life. Of course this is easier said than done as I look around and see people (well specifically women) who definitely suck married to good guys. And X who spent a total of two months single, I mean come on! Alright, breaking my own rule already. I will always have J as my date - I mean she is a pretty cute oatmeal eater (see above) and has very good manners.

3 comments:

DJSassafrass said...

You've got the right idea to focus on the positive! Better to be single and have time to spend with J and try to enjoy the things that you like rather than be in a relationship with someone who doesn't suit you! J is the cutest date anyway!

Bizarley said...

it must be something weird about men from either coast. therefore, you need to move to houston! yeahh!! :)

Anonymous said...

I hear ya. I've done the online dating where the date picked THE most expensive restaurant in Houston, then when I offered to split the bill, he nicely agreed. He also picked a $200 bottle of wine. Online dating sucks EVERYWHERE. grrrrrrr....