In my attempt to move towards having a normal relationship, I searched match.com for men around my zip code between ages 30 and 40. I haven't joined or put up a profile yet. Baby steps here. I picked about 5 guys that looked "normal" and read their profiles. Some had interesting profiles, were educated, appeared cute-ish, and got my hopes up that maybe this is a good idea.
Then at the bottom, one of the last requirements for their match is whether or not she has kids. All 5 said they required that the woman have no kids.
So for the next 5 profiles, I stopped reading the main written parts (in order to keep from getting my hopes up) and just scrolled down to that question. Only one person didn't have "none" as his answer to the have kids question, and he simply hadn't answered it. So no affirmative statement of being ok if potential matches have kids.
I am discouraged.
Now I am watching a documentary about "Jesus Camp" and it is at times freakin' scary, hilarious, and very sad. Jillian during the mass before her baptism kept telling me "I see Jesus" but she will not be attending these camps. She says I see Jesus because at her playgroup the strollers are parked in a church, so she is familiar with Him. (All those years of growing up Catholic, I can't not use the capitalized "Him." That or Jesus Camp is getting to me.)
3 comments:
What do those dudes know anyway? I'll bet they all have 5 kids they don't support!
The "I see Jesus" thing cracks me up...I'm a former Lutheran school girl. still recovering!
(This is going to be unhelpful because my mommy brain is involved) I once read an advice column about this, and the answer was, just ignore it. Those are guys who have no kids themselves and maybe very little experience with kids and they don't know what they mean when they say No Women With Kids. They think it means something other than what it does mean, like a woman with 5 kids from 4 dads looking for a sugar daddy. You shouldn't hide it from guys, but having a child is not all that you are. It's like if you put a thing on your profile that said, "No guys who like Star Wars, or have lizards as pets", it could leave out guys you might like. I wish I could remember who I read this from. The Ethicist? Dan Savage? I'm useless. You, on the other hand, are a catch.
oh and i heard that OKCupid is the spot for internet dating these days. Haven't tried it myself.
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